I have to check with my husband.

Years ago we had neighbors that were constantly at odds with each other on how they wanted to spend their weekends.  He worked all week and just wanted to be home with his family on the weekends.  She was home all week with the kids and just wanted to go out and have adult time on the weekends. 

Every weekend the same conflict ensued.  They’d end up arguing about what they were going to do until eventually one would give in.  It didn’t matter what they ended up deciding, the one who gave in would be angry or upset. 

I always wondered why they just didn’t have a conversation ahead of time.  For me, watching this weekly battle  solidified how important it is to have dialogue with your spouse about what you want.  After all, they are not mind readers.  Right? 

"The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities." - Stephen Covey

So whenever I’m invited somewhere, I rarely say “yes” right away because I have to check with my husband.  And, it seems weird to me to say that.  So I never really say, “I’ll let you know.  I have to check with my husband.”  But, I do think that.  And, it’s not because he has to give me permission.  Nor would he ever say no.  For me, it’s about being courteous and putting our relationship first. 

Every week, I have a recurring task on my calendar that’s called “coordinate calendars”.  We review the calendar for the next couple of months.  We talk about appointments and events that are coming up and we always talk about the upcoming weekend. 

We like to ask each other, “Is there anything special you want to do this weekend?” 

That one little question works like magic.  Knowing each others desires and expectations helps us to plan weekends that are harmonious. 

What about you?  How do you plan your weekends?  

Checking with your husband is sexy. 
Adrienne